Dear 2012

Well hello there 2012.  So glad to meet you.  If you see my old friend 2011, tell it I said goodbye and that it was a little too marathonish for me.  See, 2011 unfolded something like this:

Jan 9--my husband began 16 weeks of training that took him away from home every Sunday night through Friday afternoon.  He was allowed to call home each evening he was gone, but the timing was random and there were more than a few nights of waiting up past bedtime for his call because he was out in the woods dancing with trees, cleaning, holding books in the air, or whatever his "trainers" had him doing.  This wouldn't have been so bad if I wasn't 20 weeks pregnant and chasing a 3 year old...oh, and working full time.

Jan 18--my birthday.  Enough said.

Jan 25ish--we put our house up for sale...constantly keeping it "show worthy" clean in case someone called and wanted to view the house at the drop of a dime.

Feb and Mar--are just a blur as I tried to prepare us for having a baby, possibly moving, and not lose my mind.

April 7--went to doc for pregnancy check up and got sent home on modified bed rest due to elevated blood pressure...was determined not to flunk this time around.

April something or other--twice I got sent to the hospital for observation...once for four hours and once overnight.  At least I got to bond with the nurses for when the real deal happened.

April something or other again--I listed our house for rent, showed it, and rented it to the first family who responded to the ad.  We took our house off the real estate market.

April 28 or 29...I think the 28th--my husband became a fully commissioned officer who wears a gun everyday and I really started relearning my 10 codes (police language).

May 1--my husband started his new assignment 150 miles away while I stayed behind with the 3 year old and my pregnant belly.  He came home for his days off.  The other five days/week he was 150 miles away.

May 15--my husband came home so we could have a baby...and pack.  Somewhere in here, he rents us a house.  I am now moving to a house I have only seen in iphone pics.  No stress there.

May 17--we went to the hospital for an everyday c-section delivery of a full term baby girl, expecting to leave the operating room with her resting on my chest.  Instead, she went to the NICU.  If it tells you anything, I just recently remembered to ask my mom what it was my husband said when he came to the waiting room to announce her birth.  At least I remember more about the day she was born than the day her brother was born.  Oh, and they took me to see her on my way back from the OR to my room.  Not sure they normally do that, but they did!  Maybe that bonding I had done with them earlier was part of that.  My husband and I didn't allow anyone back to see her because we knew she needed rest and healing, and that isn't compatible with lots of visitors and noise.  We did take our 3 year old back to see his sister.  He got to see her through a window.  He doesn't remember it, but I do.  The look on his face was incredible and he got so quiet...which NEVER happens.

May 18, 19, 20--pretty much a blur...I remember being asked if I wanted to room in with my daughter one night before heading home...all I could think was "let's get out of here".  So, about 10 minutes before I got discharged, guess who showed up in my room ready to go home with us?  Yep, a little baby girl.  And off we went.  I was home for about 3 hours when the stress, hormones, and a little bit of self diagnosed post traumatic stress syndrome kicked in on me.  I definitely wasn't me for a few days.

May 24--lets add a wreck to the fun.  My husband is with my dad, coming back from "taking a load" from our old home to our new one. I call the doc and tell him that something just isn't right and the medicine he prescribed isn't working and I am not waiting 6 weeks for things to level out.  I won't make it that long.  Doc tells me to come in at 4:30 and he will work me in at the end of the day.  My mom is driving because I am a week out from having a c-section.  We had picked up Kale, so both kids are in the back seat.  Traffic comes to a halt on the interstate.  We stop.  The car behind us doesn't.  Nothing like a rear end collision when you have a belly wound that is trying to heal, your week old daughter in the vehicle, and your 3 year old along for the ride.  Here is the irony...whatever it was that my body needed to get me back on track was found somewhere in the reaction to that wreck.  My nerves needed something to respond to at that point and they got it in a big way.  We were all deemed fine and eventually drove on to the doctors office.  I joked with the nurse that maybe the wreck shook loose whatever had ahold of me.  Apparently, I was right.  I suddenly felt like myself again and was moving forward.

May 28--the keys were handed off to the new renters, my husband was at work and anxiously awaiting our arrival at our new home...so off we went.  Exhausted doesn't even begin to touch what we were feeling.  I think my parents are still trying to recover from those few weeks.

June--we settled in...sort of.  Kale started daycare because he would get up each morning, look at me and his sister and then ask "what are we going to do here today".  After three days of me telling him we were going to eat, nap, and change diapers...he needed something different.  He went to hang out with what he called "my kids".

July--we agreed that the rental house wasn't big enough for the four of us.  I also gave my two weeks notice at my former job and finished out my maternity leave.  I could finally tell people what had been going on in our lives.

July/August--the fields behind our rental house caught fire.  The first time, we didn't have to evacuate.  The second time, we evacuated.  Nothing like gathering up all you can and two babies and not knowing if the rest of your stuff will be charred rubble when you return.  I didn't unpack the back of my truck for a few days.  I hadn't had it unpacked the first time for more than a few hours when we realized the field was on fire and all of it went right back in the truck so we could leave...without my husband because he was off to help fight the fire.

Late July--I had applied for a job and got the awaited phone call that they wanted to hire me.  My "time off" suddenly had an end date and the worry about what to do when my maternity leave pay ended was for nothing because this job would pick up right where that pay would end.  Hello God.

August...new job, started Scout in daycare...then changed the kids daycare so they could both be at the same place...thats about all I remember about that month.

Sept--just a blur.

Oct--organized a birthday party for Kale (now 4) and then promptly started packing to move (again).  We were let out of our lease and found a larger house in a more convenient location...so off we went. I joked that we could get moved in three days.  The joke was on me.  The calvary showed up to help us move and by golly we were moved in less than three days.  I am still unpacking.

Nov and Dec...a blur of holidays...mixed with Scout learning to crawl, sit up, and pull up in a matter of a few weeks.

There was some other stuff in 2011...but mostly what I remember was stress....so, 2011, I might be a few days late...but you were fun and adventurous but I am glad you are gone.  Dear 2012, I really hope we can agree to be a little slower paced...but knowing my kids and husband, I doubt it.