For Sale or Trade

For sale or trade...one husband (man) and one son (little boy). I get them during the day, but at night they are all yours! What a deal!

Disclaimers:

Little boy likes to sleep in your bed with you. Will kick the fire out of you. Will leave toe bruises on your legs. Will even run his feet down the back of your underwear if you don't watch out, and as of last night, giggle while he does it in his sleep! Talks in his sleep and will entertain you with a "roll call" of all his words and some giggles throughout the night.

Man will snore. Its apparently not an optional feature and has not turn off valve. Saying his name loudly will make it temporarily stop, but then you risk disturbing above mentioned little boy. Man will also say all kinds of thing when the little boy kicks him. Apparently he has no volume control at night either. If upset during his sleep, he will turn over in a manner that causes the entire bed to bounce so be ready to cling desperately to the bed or be prepared to hit the floor. Man also has history of laying his hand above your head and then jumping in his sleep, which results in your head getting smacked. He will have no recollection of it in the morning, or so he will say anyway. Man also has the ability to quietly sneak out of the bed/house first thing in the morning.

Any takers?

Ok, I truly do love both of them will all my heart...just feeling a little sleep deprived at the moment...and needed to give myself some comic relief.