Friday, September 25, 2009

Please, anyone?

Ok, I need help today. Let me raise both my hands and say oh me, please pick me, when someone sends the help wagon around. I NEED HELP! Ok, just saying that to the entire web universe (or maybe just the 5 people who read this) helps.

I haven't slept all night, all week. During the day, Kale is happy with either mommy or daddy. At any given point, either of those will do. However, come nightfall he becomes my boy. As we cuddle in bed at 8pm and he drifts off to sleep, this is a wonderful snuggly thing. At midnight, 2:24am, and 5:45am....not so much. Ep was given one night this week to take care of any middle of the night calls. When the first call came in, Kale landed in our bed with his bottle. So, yeah, after last night's my bed, his bed, my bed, his bed--Kale showed his true Fletcher blood and decided it was time to be awake at 5:45am. I gave him strawberry (baberry) milk and hoped he would drift back off. Nope, instead he clunked me in the head with the tv remote control.

The highlight of my morning was when Ep told me he figured out the awful smell in the garage and it was all his fault. For a moment, I wondered how a dead mouse/frog/whatever had died in there could be his fault. Then I see the mess in the floor around the freezer. Now, we haven't lost electricity recently, so why has the ice cream melted and oozed out of the freezer? Everything then happens in slow motion for me. My first assumption is that he forgot to fully close the freezer door, but when was the last time he opened the freezer door? No, its better. He tells me that he turned off the electrical switch that controls the outlet for the freezer. Yes, this outlet has its own breaker switch. Its on the garage wall. Its been there since we moved in. I don't think either of us has so much as touched it since we moved in. All I can say is why. Why? Please give me a good reason because now all that food is ruined and there is a mess to clean up. Most of that food was bought dirt cheap with coupons when things were on sale and some of it was even bought by other people. It was a great stockpile so please tell me WHY the switch needed to be turned off. Oh, well, he saw the switch was on and just decided to turn it off. At that moment, every obscenity I know was trying to bounce its way out of my mouth, but it didn't for the pure fact that our son was standing between us and looking up at me. But oh how I yelled. I still want to yell. I will still want to yell this time next week. So I repeat it back to see the switch is on and you turn it off---did you stop to think about what might be getting power from that switch? Well, no. I think I levitated I was so mad. I think my blood pressure rivaled the levels it saw on 10/20/07 right before I had an emergency c-section. And then I found the words to say this: That makes about as much sense as me getting a knife and cutting slashes in your boat cover. And yes, I seriously thought about going inside and getting the knife to do just that. I had decided to wear a hog red shirt today...and at that moment, I am pretty sure that the color of my face matched the color of my shirt. I went to the freezer and looked inside...and then slammed the door. Frozen vegetables, brats, at least 10 pizzas, meat, ice cream, popsicles (ok, those can be saved), and I am sure some other things that I missed. Seriously, I was trying to understand what drives a person to just walk over to a switch that they haven't ever bothered for 4 years and just turn it off and NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT WHAT MIGHT BE GETTING POWER FROM THAT SWITCH WHEN A FREAKING STAND UP FREEZER IS LESS THAN 3 FEET FROM THE SWITCH!!!!!!!! Someone, anyone, please help me grasp this. I think I tried to explain that when I have a hard time trusting him, its because of these moments...when he does things that have no explanation and there is no reasoning behind it. Things that baffle me and can't be expected, predicted, anticipated, or anything. Just BAM, let me sideswipe you with this thing that you didn't see coming. I told that since he thought it through so well, he could be the one to clean up the mess and buy the food to replace everything that was ruined. Ep retreated out the door. I know he said something about being sorry and that he loved me...but thats about it. And then he left for work while I consoled our son who had just fallen on a toy at my feet. So I did what any responsible mommy would do. I consoled him and then picked up the toy and threw it as hard as I could across the span our our enclosed garage. Luckily, its a hollowed out toy that catches air, so I didn't smash itself or anything. Yep, great choice of action there mommy. Oh well. If anyone would have offered a time out option at that point, I would have gladly taken it. But instead, there was medicine to give and bags to carry to the truck goes on.

So here I sit, still fuming. Wanting to let this go, but seemingly can't. I need a reason for that kind of action, and in this case there is none. If my co-worker shows up today and acts like she has for the past week or so...I might seriously go to jail today. So have your bail money ready.

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